Watch Your Walls!

While browsing the internet the other night, I came across this amazing photo.

It's almost as if it were made for me.

This photo pretty much sums up what got me started on this journey.

So, I share it now with you all.

Hopefully, it'll be a reminder to you (as it is to me) that there is FAR more to us than what the world may see and try to define us as - and the things the world tells us that we feel as though we must accept.

Remember: you are more than a diagnosis. Don't let a small aspect of your life define your life.

PS  If I could remember where this photo came from, I would totally give the photo credit.  My apologizes to wherever it came from!

Getting Outside the Box

When I presented my first goal, I mentioned how I had put myself in a box.  A box where I had lived my life dictated by a diagnosis. 

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I've been living in a box well before my diagnosis.

I've spent a good portion of my life living in a box.

Rarely have I ever gone out of my way to try something new, to meet people that are different than myself or those I grew up around, to participate in some random activity that my normal self would run in the opposite direction from.

Lately, I've been pushing myself to get outside of this box - not just the chronic migraine box.  But to also get out of my "life norm" box.

I had a friend point out to me that I only have light colored nail polish - many shades of pink, silver, and neutral colors. 

So, while at the dollar store the other day (Yes, I said dollar store.  I absolutely love that place - walk out with a lot without feeling a major hurt on your wallet.), I noticed they had some nail polish.  But not just any nail polish - black nail polish.

Never in my life have I owned muchless painted my nails black.

I figured I'd splurge and buy myself the $1 bottle.

When I got home, I painted my finger and toe nails this deep black color.  After a few coats and a top coat, I took the chance to admire my work and evaluate this new experience. 

Believe it or not - I love it!!  It's so bold, so out there, so hello!  I find myself purposely finding ways to show off my fingers, point things out, wear open toe shoes, simply so I can show off my new polish.

As "unprofessional" as this world has labeled black nail polish, my professional self is in love with it!

And as timid and nervous and uneasy as I was to take the big leap and paint my nails black, I'm so glad I jumped!  Who knew such an intense shade of polish could not only make someone so happy but bring out so much inner pride and strength?!

I know you're probably thinking - seriously, you only painted your nails.  You are honestly this excited over just painting your nails??

Here's the big reason why I'm so excited about "just" painting my nails:

This is a new experience.  One I never would have done had it not been for a friend pointing out the lack of variety in my life. Yes, my "life norm" is really just a lack of variety in my life.

Variety.  I added variety to my life.  I did something so out of my norm.  I got out of my box.

Sure, it's just something as small and simple as painting my nails.

But we all have to start somewhere, right??

Challenge yourself this week - or today, for that matter - to get outside of your box.  Even if it's just something small. 

And please don't hesitate to share how you're getting out of your box.  This journey isn't nearly as fun and enjoyable unless you take people along with you and listen as they share their story!

I've made a mistake...

A few weeks ago, I had this breakthrough realization regarding my chronic migraine life.

After my diagnosis, I made one big huge mistake.

I let it define me.

I let being a chronic migraine sufferer define me.

You know how some people define themselves by their roles - a teacher, a parent, a sister, an advocate, etc.?  I have been defining myself by my diagnosis.

But, here's the thing... My diagnosis, while it is a part of me, it isn't who I am.

For the past few years, I've let being a chronic migraine sufferer be who I am. 

There's so much more to me than just my diagnosis.

So, I've embarked on a journey to find who I really am.  Being a chronic migraine sufferer isn't who I am, it's just something that I happen to deal with - just like others may happen to deal with a broken bone, or a bug bite, or a cut/scrape. 

While I'm not quite sure who I really am right now (hence this journey), there are a few things I do know about me.  First and foremost, I am a follower of Christ.  I have devoted my life to the Lord and to doing as God commands of me.  I'm also an advocate.  I am a daughter, a sister, a friend.  I am a giver - I want to help others any way I can.  I'm an organizer.  I am a problem solver.  I am a fighter - I don't give up without a fight.  I am a child of God. 

Did you notice that being a chronic migraine sufferer didn't make that list?  I purposely left it off.  Because putting it on that list would be like saying I'm a broken toe survivor.  Yeah, I've broken my toe.  Yeah, it totally hurts.  But I don't meet people and say, "Hey! I've broken my toe before. So nice to meet you!"  That's totally ridicilious sounding, right?  Well so is choosing to let a diagnosis define me. 

There's far more to me than just a diagnosis. 

It's taken me a long time to realize this.  But, once I had that breakthrough, I realized there was so much in life I was missing out on because of the way I had chosen to define myself.  Notice how I worded that - the way I had chosen to define myself.  I put myself in that box.  And now, I'm taking myself out of that box.

So, here's to starting a journey outside of the box - a journey to find who I truly am.  Because, somewhere inbetween being diagnosed and making myself stay in a box defined simply by a diagnosis, I've lost sight of me - I've lost myself.  Here's to finding me - possibly for the first time in my adult life...