Social Experiment

I am not from the South.

However, I currently live in the South.  To be more specific, the Deep South.

Because I'm not from here, I like to conduct random social experiments.  I do it partially because I like to be reminded of how different life is where I'm from.  And because it's just hilarious at times to see the major differences between life down South versus life above the Mason-Dixon line.

For the past few years, I've been conducting an ongoing (personal) social experiment.

People in the South love giving out compliments.  I'm convinced they love giving them out just slightly more than they love receiving them.

Complimenting a Southerner is one thing.  Complimenting a Southerner's child - that takes it to a whole new level!

People in the North will usually sometimes accept you complimenting them.  If you compliment them on their child, look out! It's likely the last you'll see of that person is them running as fast as they can away from you.

Don't believe me?  Here's a story --

I was up North visiting my family.  Saw this super absolutely adorable child being pushed in a stroller by his mother.  I quickly got my mother's attention so she could oogle over this absolutely adorable child with me.  What did the absolutely adorable child's mother do as soon as she noticed us?  She quickly turned her stroller in the opposite direction and did her best to avoid us.

I was down here in the Deep South.  Went out to a social event.  A mother walked in with her precious newborn still fresh with new baby smell.  I commented on how precious and sweet and tiny and adorable her little one was.  Then I asked how old.  To my shock, she told me!  And, because that wasn't enough, she stood there for a few more minutes letting me oogle over her precious little one.  I saw her a few months later at another social event.  Mind you, I didn't even know this woman's name.  Turns out she was a friend of a friend.  When my friend went to introduce us, the woman said, "I know you!! We met a few months ago!  You commented on how new my baby was and how absolutely adorable he is!"  Not kidding.

Another example.  Went to the gym.  My gym has a little daycare center for moms to drop their kids off at while they work out.  As I was leaving, a woman was standing at the front desk with her two precious strawberry blonde headed children.  I mean, I'll be honest and tell you that redheads are my weakness (seriously, like every guy I've ever dated had red in his hair).  But those kids, oh my!!  I'd of course seen this woman at the gym a few times, but we'd never talked more than a passing hello.  Well, upon seeing her incredibly precious strawberry blonde headed children, I went into full Southern complimenting mode.

I mean, I was really going crazy over the preciousness of these children.  (Remember, redheads are my weakness!)  If this whole event happened up North, I can assure you that woman would have been running to a courthouse to take out a restraining order against me.  But, down here in the Deep South?  Totally different story!!

This woman enthusiastically thanked me for my "sweet compliments."  And then she proceeded to talk to me about her life and ask me questions about mine.  Basically, we became instant BFFs.

Moral of the story (aka social experiment) --

Enthusiastically compliment a random stranger up North, they will run in the opposite direction.   If your compliment is incredibly enthusiastic (as mine often tend to be), they'll likely get a restraining order against you.  Just kidding (not really).

Enthusiastically compliment a random stranger down South, be prepared to chat it up with them for the next 5 minutes.  If your compliment is incredibly enthusiastic (see above), you'll likely become instant BFFs.  Seriously.  Not kidding.

Insomnia

Being an insomniac and being a migraineur isn't the greatest combo.

Separately, those two things aren't fun.  Together - really not fun.

Well, about a month ago, I started studying for my licensing exam.  Which means studying about 10 hours a day, every day.  Which also means lots of stress.

Stress, migraines, and insomnia.  Incredibly not fun.

After getting 2 hours of sleep max a night for like 3 weeks straight, I finally reached my breaking point.  Physically and emotionally.

For some odd reason, I tend to have all my emotional breakdowns in my car.  No clue why.  It's just my place.

Well, Monday was meltdown Monday for me.

The stress, the exhaustion, the abuse I've been putting myself through, the frustration with self - it all came crashing down.

I ended up in my car, melting down, calling the doctor leaving some rambling message through tears begging for help.  I'd probably be embarrassed about leaving a message where I'm in total hot mess mode, but for the fact that my doctor has seen me at my best and at my worst.  So I allow myself to be okay with letting him see/hear me in hot mess mode.  After all, allowing him to see that side of me really has helped with our relationship and treatment plan.

1 hour later, I was off to the pharmacy to get some sleeping pills courtesy of my wonderful doctor - because Benadryl, camomile tea, hot showers, working out, meditation, combo of all the above was not inducing sleep.  

I've never been a good sleeper.  But these pills have made me realize just how bad of a sleeper I am!  I mean, I knew getting 2 hours of sleep a night was not good or normal.  But I honestly don't think I ever experienced REM sleep till this week.

I've been in bed, asleep, before 1am every night.  I'm usually up, wide awake, till 4am.  Ok, let's be honest, more like 5am.  So being asleep and staying asleep all night long is a totally new thing for me.  And I'm totally loving it.

My doctor has always harped to me how important sleep is for my migraines.  I always understood that.  But I never truly understood it till this week.  It's crazy how sleep really does help with the migraines!

Here's my only negative thought on sleeping pills -- for some reason, they take 2 hours to knock me out.  But, after about an hour, my legs are asleep (figured that one out the hard way).  My body is more eager to shut down than my mind, but isn't that how it often is?  

Despite everyone warning me about the crazy side effects, the only thing "crazy" I've done thus far is flipped my pillow over in my sleep.  I can most definitely handle that kind of crazy!

All in all, the pros outweigh the cons.  

And, while stress isn't all that fun, it's far more bearable (and easier to handle) than stress + migraines + insomnia.

Overcoming Vertigo

When I was first diagnosed with migraines, I was pretty quiet about it.  Mostly because I was still trying to figure out what migraines were and what having migraines meant to me.

About a year after I was originally diagnosed, the migraines became far more frequent and intense.  It was at that point where I was diagnosed as having chronic migraines.  I went from having maybe one migraine a month to at least 3 a week.

The more frequent the migraines became, the more vocal I became about having migraines.

I did that for numerous reasons.  The main one being I just wasn't able to do it all anymore.  I needed help.  And unless you tell people you need help, they don't know.

Becoming more comfortable with being vocal about migraines lead to two really neat things.  One, I was able to be more vocal with my doctor.  I could ask really incredibly honest and candid questions, questions that I may have previously googled to find an answer to.  I was able to sit down with my doctor and be completely honest with him about my fear of having a stroke.  And we had a really good, really lengthy conversation about my stroke risks, things that raised my risk, and things I could do to help decrease my risk.

The second really neat thing that happened was people started sharing their migraine stories with me.  I learned about different symptoms others suffered from.  Which helped shed some light on symptoms I had but didn't quite understand.  It helped me realize that some of what I thought was me going crazy was just the migraines.

The other night, a friend of mine texted asking if I ever experienced vertigo with my migraines.  When I told her I had, she asked me what I did for them.

Well, a few months ago, I was really struggling with vertigo.  I knew it was because I was getting close to needing another round of Botox.  But, it was miserable.  Being single, working two jobs, and going to school, the vertigo was just too much.  After a call to the doctor, I was told to start drinking Gatorade.

Ok, call me crazy, but I absolutely hate Gatorade.  Hate it.  I have yet to find a flavor that is somewhat bearable.  Upon advice from my doctor's secretary, I bought the grape kind (which tastes nothing like any grape I've ever had).  I also bought the low calorie kind knowing the vertigo was too much for me to go run on a treadmill to work off the amount of calories in a normal Gatorade.  I also bought the kind that was high in electrolytes and high in carbs (which also happened to be the kosher kind).

I quickly learned that sipping on the Gatorade was no way to help the vertigo.  I had to actually drink a fair amount of the stuff.  And the only way I could somewhat stand to do that was to make sure it was super super cold.

So, I passed this advice on over to my friend.  She then told me something that most people wouldn't find nearly as sweet as I did.  She said, "When my doctor isn't available, you're my next contact."

I often forget how lucky I am to have the doctor I have.  If I call his office, I usually get a call back with an answer in about an hour.  If I know my doctor's secretary is out of town, I have his email address.  Very rarely am I left to suffer wondering what to do.

I'm so grateful that I have formed the personal relationship with my doctor that I have.  Because, if nothing else, it has really helped me to not fear the migraines, to not fear talking about migraines, and to be comfortable enough to share my migraine story with others - especially in their time of need.