The gift of YOU!

The holiday season is officially upon us!

While many are rejoicing, chronic migraine sufferers are likely hiding out in their dark bedrooms with their meds and a cool rag over their head.

Here's the question of the season - why do migraines (or any other chronic illness) tend to flare up during this time of year, the time of year where we so badly want to be out celebrating and not hiding inside in pain?

While there are many factors (food choices, weather changes, cold/flu season, etc.), it often boils down to one thing.

Stress.

Stress.  It gets us chronic sufferers every time.  We think we can make it and then, BAM, stress hits.  And with it, it brings the migraines, the retreating to quiet, to safety, to seclusion.

I know what you're thinking...stress is a factor of life.  How can you escape it??

As simple as the answer sounds, execution of it is anything but.

The solution - take time to take care of you.

I'm not just referring to taking your daily meds or popping your abortive medication.

I'm talking about ALL of you - the physical, the spiritual, and the psychological you.

Yes, my friends.  I said it.  The psychological you.

But how, you ask? How can you take care of the psychological you??

Stop.  Take a time out.  Make time for you.

Craft, bake, blog, read, soak in the tub, write, sing, pray, breathe.

This holiday season, don't forget to give yourself a gift - the gift of a time out.  Time to enjoy, time to think, time to relax, time to breathe, time for you.

Happy holidays!! May the Lord continue to watch over and bless you not only this time of year, but in the upcoming year (bring it on 2013!).

Why me?

I've heard so many people say this phrase.

It's often said after a diagnosis or on a day where you're really struggling.

Whenever I hear it, I often think to myself about how people are forgetting one word in that sentence.  One small little word.

And that word is 'not.'

Why not me??

This is why I say God blessed me with chronic migraines, depression, whatever other challenges I may face in life - physical or mental.

My friends all know if they get a headache, I'm going to have some Aleve/Ibuproen on me.  And I don't mind one bit giving them one of those OTC pills to provide them with some relief.

Those who know me know that, should they be struggling with depression, I have no problem driving over to their house and getting them out of bed.  Pulling them out of bed if need be.

I think a lot of people with any kind of struggle in life are afraid to share it.  Afraid of what others will think once they find out.  Afraid of how others will judge them.

The beautiful thing about being open about our struggles is that others know that if they are facing the same challenges, they can openly talk to you about it.  You know what it's like.  You know how hard it can be to fight and overcome.

Most importantly, they know that you won't judge them for their struggles and challenges.

So, why not me??

God chose to bless me with all off these challenges.  On what grounds do I have to question Him?? Him - my Father, our Creator, my first love.

If, in God so blessing me, I can help others with their struggles and challenges, then this I ask -- why not me?

Why I Blog

There are many things I struggle with in life.

But, close to being at the top of my list of struggles is sharing my emotions.

Emotions.

They're something we all experience.

But it's also something we all have a different way of showing.

I'm a hider of emotions.

I think it all ties back to having a chronic illness.

In the eyes of others, you are always sick.  It's all in your head.  You need to get over yourself and then your life will get better.

I heard those phrases so many times in my life that I began to shut down.  Notice - I didn't say I believed them (because that couldn't have been further from the truth).  I simply just shut down.

Sure, I was in serious pain.  But unless I truly trusted you, you didn't know.  I smiled a fake smile.  When asked how I was feeling, I'd always respond with a "good" or a "fine," even when that wasn't the truth.

Here's the thing, though -- not only do I struggle with showing emotion, but I struggle with how to deal with situations where others are showing emotion.

I find emotional situations to be awkward, uncomfortable, and situations in which I want to flee as fast as possible from.

Ultimately, this is why I blog.

I still am struggling with how to experience emotions, show emotions, not be perceived as "cold-hearted" or "shut out."

Writing, blogging, helps me figure out how to express emotions through words.  Once I am able to see how I feel, that helps me to understand how I feel and thus fully experience emotions.

I don't blog so I can be the next professional blogger.

I blog so I can find me.  Learn who I am.  And, eventually, (or maybe even hopefully) begin to understand and accept myself for being just that - me.

Goal #3 for my journey: Ignore my blog statistics. Remember that I'm doing this for me and only me.  I am giving myself permission to allow myself to write about, experience, feel whatever emotions may come my way.  And I'm not going to let my Blogger stats (however high or low they may be) get in the way of this journey - my journey.